Letting Go

Letting go of someone you love is one of the hardest things you can do, but it’s also very necessary. If you don’t let go, you may end up smothering them and they will want to stay away from you. If someone was always worried about you and always judging every little thing you do, and panicking over seemingly tiny things… would you want to spend more time with them or less? This counts for every kind of relationship, but seems to be a common problem among parents for some reason. I believe they call it “overprotective”. It really comes down to fear and trust. Just like you are more likely to know what’s best for you than even your closest friend, it goes both ways. Just because the person is doing something that looks like a really bad idea to you, doesn’t mean they’re making a huge mistake. It may actually be right for them. And even if it isn’t, mistakes are not the end of the world unless they’re fatal – the entire point of mistakes is to learn from them. If you keep someone from making mistakes, you are keeping them from learning… you would be holding them back. You don’t want to do that, do you?

This doesn’t mean you should never give people advice or tell them what you think, though. By all means, do so. But don’t become “obsessed” with it, or nag them about it or keep bringing it up every other day. That will just make them even less likely to want to listen to you. If you really feel a need to get a point across to someone, the best way to do it is by example. Practice what you preach. Mention it every now and then if you must. But most importantly, give them a REASON to listen to you. And respect their decisions.


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About The Meaning Of Love

I write about love because I have always been deeply bothered by society’s definitions of love and how most people talk about love, and everything they associate with it. I have given this topic years of thought, and always found it extremely hard to explain my thoughts in actual words. How do you explain something as abstract and unexplainable as love? Sometimes the topic comes up on forums and I always respond to people as best I can. At first I was terrible at getting my point across, but after enough attempts I actually started to make some sense to myself. Then one day I realized I had typed quite a lot, and I never seem to run out of steam on this topic, so why not write some full articles about it? Click my little picture on the left to see all my articles.

39 Replies to “Letting Go”

  1. It is true that love cannot be priscribed.
    Love should be well understood by the individual person,according to me love is powerful if you give it out with passion,selflessly,willingly.
    Love starts with you,if you love someon you must not keep record of the past failors but remember that it is growing every day and it must be natured.Love originates from God who created the heaven and the earth.It is important to seek wisdom from God above who never fail.

  2. The feeling of “LETTING GO” ,someone is the most painful aspect in everyone’s life,especially when you love someone dearly and..when you know you are about to lose him,too.In case of boys,80% boys don’t go through this painful feeling,after breakup as compared to 80% of girls….perhaps,because of the fact that,they(boys) want to move on in life,what in their term implies ,living BINDAAS,adjusting with time….But,then,what I feel is you(girls)should not force your partner to stay with if HE wants to come out of the relation..because once you make him stay with you without his own wish,hell will knock at your door naturally,you will have a guilty feeling..you will gradually start observing that,physically he might be with you,but,then,mentally,he is somewhere else..In such a case,we should ,without any hesitation let him go..i.e.,LETTING GO..well,letting go is a nice topic to discuss..still,that much for now.

  3. What is meant when said, you must love yourself first? Is loving yourself first, someone that works out, takes care of their health and beauty? Or is it someone with fatty genes and pleases their sweetooth.

  4. Love is an addiction and people should not play head games or use them for their advantage, if a person is not loved then leave them alone. People have taken their own lifes when they realize they have been lied too. Sometimes it is lack of communication or misunderstanding. Maybe we should have a law aganist cheaters. Of course our court rooms would be crowded, but maybe crime would slow down in other areas. Our population could be less?


  6. well i have been reading all these post and the topic in which we all seem to be wondering about and have come to the conclution that at the end of the day love is something different to everbody. I have just went thru a break up I did love her unconditionally i truly know what that feels like but in return she took my heart and rippied right out of my chest stomped on a bit and returned it with a smile so unless you want to get your heart ripped out there will always be guarded love and that is only for your own well being will stay in tact it is only my view but have truely let go of the idea of true love and time to just settle.

  7. I have recently been threw a tragic break up and i can say that i truly did love him with all of my heart, but in return all i got was my heart broken. The pain i went threw could not be put into words, and i’ll never forget it. It was like my heart droped out of my butt fell to the ground and was stabbed repeatedly and yet it was still beating but only bariely just to endure the pain from it all. Though thats only puting it as an example. Though months later i started talking to this guy and we hit it off, we have been dating for the past 3 months and about a week ago he told me he loved me. Of coarse i was in shock and didn’t know what to say to him in return so i just walked away. Horrible way to end the conversation i’ll tell you that much. But it was then that i realized that once my heart was truly broken it’s harder for me to know love and to feel love again for another person. Hopefully my insight on this will change through time but as for now i’m just living my life.

  8. I agree, letting go has been one of the hardest things ive dealt with. We didnt have a good realtionship at all(lasted 1 and a half years) which is why I ended it.. I am now with somebody new who makes me feel like ive never felt before, but i still find my self thinking about my ex, and missing him but not actually him.. maybe just his presence. I have no clue but i think it is because he was my first actual real relationship and im feeling as if i put a wall up around my heart, even though i dont want it there. Because in the end eventually it is not fair to whoever comes into my life.

  9. withiut love this world itself could not exist.
    so human are only characters so they must have love in each other.love creates adventrous environment 2 move 4ward & 2 hav hapy life

  10. i’m having this issue im glad i googled this> i read it outloud so that my bf can hear. he agree

  11. As a writer of adult romance, we all love and lose it is one of the hardest feelings to experience but not to let love in again is closing yourself off to the joys of life. Let go then move on for if it was meant to be they would be there and it just might be their gift to you for you just might find the right person in the end.

  12. I have been without this guy for 5-6 months now and letting go is the hardest thing to do when you know that you love that person. I have not yet let go. I have never felt feelings for this guy then any other girl that I have dated. He loved me very much and our lovee was unexplainable. I still to this day talk to him but just as a friend. He was the first and only one to brake my heart. Everytime we talk it gets harder to not be with him every minute of the day. I am contiuing to try to talk him to bring the past back and be more than just my friend. It hurts to know that I probably am going to fail. Letting go is the hardest for me because I just can’t forget the first time we kissed. It was magic. No girl ever but butterflies in my stomach the way he did. So for those that read this. Trust me the best thing to do is to let go otherwise you will never find peace again.

  13. Hey again. Letting go feels like your heart is getting stabbed and it just won’t stop. When you love someone, you know. I try every day to forget him but it kills me inside. I feel life is not worth living for without your true love. I feel like dying if I’m not with him. He was the one for me. I will always love him. I will never try to let go

  14. And for those that wanna know. I am not gay. I am bisexual. That’s if my post confused you

  15. Wow! This is so true. I’m 23 yrs old and my mother and I used to be close. But I find myself drawing further and further away. Know it’s for the good though.


  17. I really, truly, and undoubtedly loved my wife we have been married for the better part of 4 years now and like any relationship we have had our ups and downs… All the things ive put myself through for this love and to have it end up like this makes me believe that true love dosn’t exist. What with all the lieing and cheating she has pulled off on me…and still it is hard to let go, part of me still dosnt want to let go and just stay with her but the reasonable side of me says to end it that ive had enough and that maby…just maby ill find my true love out there. Yes out of all the experiences I have had in my life thus far this is by far the hardest to overcome as of yet.

  18. I belive that letting go someone is really hard I had to that many times for many reasons as in there ages and parents didnt like them or we both cheated on one another or we didnt get to see one another or what not but yes it is really hard no matter what happen or anything it is hard

  19. im 14 years old and i really do belive letting go is so hard I have been cheated on and played and everything by this person but i still belived it was hard

  20. its nicole again like i said while i was reading some of these came to ma mind it is hard letting go i mean letting letting go because i still think of someone day and night and i have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend which is like ma friend and everything yes me and this chick did have problems but yea he did say he wants nothing to do with me and i was like his sex toy or whatever but i mean i can let let him go you know what i mean i have been thru alot of shit even tho im 14 add me lovinhimnomatterhwat@yahoo.com

  21. Charles hello ma name is nicole i understand what you are sayin letting go is hard but if she is cheating and lieing to you, you should not be with her because cheating is so wrong yes love is out there but u just got 2 find the right one i have been cheated and played so many damn times in ma life but i do belive that love is out there

  22. It is realy difficult to let go. I had a boyfriend who asked that we quit just because he must stick with his books. It is difficult for me to let go but who knows, may be my true love is out there.

  23. It seemed to me the post was about actually letting someone go in a loving way, allowing them to follow their path, because you care for them, rather than letting go after a nasty break up. Different connotations. Because even in a loving relationship, you do need to let them go, so they are with you because they want to be.
    I’ve been beating myself up over letting go of a guy and moving on – it was going so well between us until I moved away. And it was hurting A Lot. In the end, it was like ‘why am I hurting myself? Why am I hurting him?’ Let go – and accept that I care about him, that he cares about me, but our paths are separate at this time. Is that love? Maybe. Is that loving? Yes

  24. Been really concerned with myself of late got serious issues with this topic i even had to google it……letting go is like saying to yourself…i give up! I don`t love her anymore, everything we shared is lost and everyword i said has been forgotton by her. I believe with my whole heart,you can convince someone your feelings are true…so long as your intentions are pure and righteous. For if you give up on love…you give up on the battle that Jesus won before you…..it was won before you..it can be won again. Faith in it will show anyone, the cold,and the unemotional, sooner or later the ice will melt and even the cruel will feel love. That is our purpose here on this earth. I`ve had this woman in my life…leave me 3 times in two years.And before that we dated for 2years…we parted for 5 years. Not cause i pushed her away…she just left me. But she keeps coming back. We got a catch and release system it seems. All i know is if you love someone you don`t quit. just look at the divorce rate!! Dont quit!!!!!

  25. @ Junie($) exactly exactly what i`m saying…its murder to yourself if you walk away. Unless the person you pursue is a sociopath and enjoys hurting you. If you have discovered this person is not that…then he or she in your case is a perfect human being who feels…and if they feel they love…and if they love..then nothing is impossible with love. NOTHING!!! “LIVE IN LOVE” Goodluck.

  26. ‘letting go’ we all know is so hard i try to do what is right these three things have helped me……. 3 key elements
    1 being self worth (what you are really worth is more than you know)
    2 being self respect(do you feel you are not getting all the respect you deserve cause you know you are worth more than that?)
    4 being standards(know what your worth, set standards as to what you know you deserve out self respect. and knowing what your worth im not some yobbo that goes to the pub that would be the last place on earth i would want to get stuck at with my partner as soon as he takes me into a pub with his immature friends that have little respect for there so called girlfrends, makes me feel like one of them and thats when i realised i am worth soooo much more than to be taken to a pub and labeled as a dumb bitch like the rest of them. so i left it at that and got the fuck out of there and will wait for someone to realise what i am worth and treat me with all the respect i deserve as i will unto them eaqually.

  27. What about letting go of a love for a person who has passed. Lets talk about that. I lost my wife of ten years and have yet to let it go. It has interfered with four relationships in two years. You don’t just let love go.

  28. True. Would she want you to be happy without her around or would she want to interfere with your other relationships?

  29. yes letting go is definitely something veryyyy hard but with the support from your friends and family, you will get through anything. I promise!!!!

  30. I agree letting go is hard. But I have more questions than answers. I mean im an 18 year old girl who has.had bfs while liking someone else. I’ve tried letting go of this guy so that my relationships would work, but somehow I always end up thinking bout that guy. Ive tlkd to pther people bout it and asked for advice and I try taking their advice but ot always ends up back to the beginning. Like I said, I have more questions than answers and im to the point where I just want to break down. I feel like telling him how I feel towards him but I can’t cuz

    1. He’ almost 10 years older than me.
    2. He’s in a higher athorative position than I am.
    3. I don’t know of what I feel for him is real feelings of like or omis it a crush?.
    4. I wouldn’t be able to handle his rejection.

    The best thing for me to do is to let go of him even he was never mine and he never ever had feelings for me. So I want to know how do u let go of someone that you constantly think about? How do u move on to be back to being peaceful? How can the heart and mind let go of that person ??? I need help and a friend that I can talk to :/

  31. is hard to let go.i was in a relationship for 11yrs never got married now has bn a year that i have not bn with that person and is hard bc i feel like i still love him i fell this inside of me but he has moved on he move in with his old girlfriend now i think that he never loved me how can i get over it? how can a person get over u that easy bc i can i ask god to help me,and yes we have a son together at the bng was hard for him he use to be sad all times that was hurting me c him like that what can i do how can i move on

  32. im crying inside…its really hard to let go someone you loved.but its really more hurting me if im seeing him unhappy to be with me.he admits that he dont love me anymore and he have someone else that he really love.i cant eat,im crying for 1week now.his not coming home unless he will change his dress and get some of his stuff.im just counting a days to set up my new accomodation so i can move on.i cant explain the pain…depressed….frustration and dissapointment!!!and betrayal>>

  33. i broke up with my gf…as she cheated on me…at the moment i was angry on her n broke up with her in anger…but i still love her n miss her alot…i didn’t told her or make her feel i still love her..so if any1 can help me…should i tell her what i feel for her or not reply

  34. Its hard to let go of the person you love so much…I love him so much, the problem is he has a girlfriend and they have been together for almost two years. He told me that he likes me and take care of me but he never said he loves me, he loves her girlfriend too much and that is his life and everything. He never hide anything from me..i love him so much but i’m hurting too much because i know her mind and heart is not for me..i want to let him go but its very hard because i love him..I hope one day i could get over with this situation..but whatever happen “i love him so much..”

  35. I agree with what you have to say about true love. It’s taken me all my life to realize it, but my ideas about love were limited at best, and very wrong. I am learning, tho, to love no matter what, and want the best for my family and friends. And to give them the freedom to decide what that is. It is freedom for me, too, because now the burden of loving conditionally is no longer on me. It’s all good. This changes my whole outlook on life. Thank you for your helpand insight.

  36. I have to say this is the same for some guys. I recently lost the girl of my dreams we had so many happy memories and I believed we loved each other so much but one day she said to me she doesnt love me anymore and I was shocked, confused and destroyed. I can’t express the feeling of pain and hurt I felt and now she won’t talk to me. I dont believe she understands what love is and what she is doing to me but I would always take her back. She is my everything and I need to know what to do to get her back because I cant let go…

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